Daily Archives: June 7, 2012

The Return Of The Crap (Again)

Did any of you watch the Sox on Sunday? You missed, as I said on Facebook, a classic implosion. Daniel Bard had zero clue where the ball was going when it left his hand. It resulted in a pitching line of 1 2/3 inning pitched, 6 walked, two hit batters, and five earned runs on….one hit. Yup, one hit.

So the media has been talking for a while about how much rope this kid would get. Well apparently the answer is enough to get to June. Since he ranks second to last in walk/strikeout ratio, leads the league in hit batters, and is fifth in the league in walks. He needs to learn some control. Or to quote the great Lou Brown in Major League, “Better teach this kid some control before he kills somebody.”

So the team sends Bard and his stupid looking beard to Pawtucket. With Bard’s control issues and Buchholz’s 6.58 ERA that Wakefield wouldn’t have been a better option at the end of your rotation. Just Saying.

But back to Bard. With him headed south on 95 who’s taking his place in the rotation? Yup, the Craptastic One; Daisuke Matsucrappa.

Talk about a guy we didn’t want to hear from. I was hoping we’d NEVER see this guy at Fenway again. But sure enough he rushed through his rehab and is back with the big league club.

Great.

I think what bothers me even more than the fact that he’s back at Fenway is that this ownership and management group won’t be getting rid of him anytime soon. Sure his contract is up this year, but you know the team is going to offer arbitration. That’s their M.O. They’re going to make sure they get their draft picks if another team attempts to sign him because they’re greedy assholefaces.

So the Craptastic One will make his return on Saturday against the first place Nationals (not a typo). Personally I can just hope he gets shelled or re-throws out his arm and heads back to the DL. It beats watching 60 pitch innings which are so painful in Matsucrappa starts.

At least we have the Celtics tonight, possibly Saturday, and possible beyond. When’s football season start again?

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